“I don’t have anything to prove anymore. I can relax.” Paloma Picasso – born April 19th 1949.
Daughter of the world famous artist Pablo Picasso, a hard act to follow?
It depends on how you view your life. From this quote I image that she has spent a lifetime doing everything possible to leave the shadow of her father behind. She may have developed a fear that she would never live up to her father’s achievements.
Do those of us not born to famous parents make our own paths or follow in the footsteps of mum and dad? There are arguments for everything being preordained almost by your genetic make up.
The other side believe that we are formed out of our environment and experiences.
I believe that whilst genetics play an important role in how we navigate our way through life – it’s our surroundings and the things we go through that make us who we are.
Research suggests that we’re born with a fear of only two things, falling and loud noises. Banging your head as a toddler hurts and is dangerous because our skulls aren’t completely fused and strong enough to protect our brains until we’re around 20. The two fontanels (soft spots in our skulls) don’t closed up until we’re three.
It makes sense to be afraid of falling. Our young ears are hyper sensitive as infants so the last thing we need are loud bangs which must hurt like hell but also are potentailly damaging.
So how do we develop the other fears that exist today? Fear of spiders, flying and open spaces to name three? They must come from what we observe and experience whilst growing up.
How else could they become part of your map of reality?
The actions, words, thoughts, and emotions absorbed from our small world of connections – family, friends, school life – have a huge impact on us. More than we are probably prepared to admit.
Take a moment to think about where some of your deepest beliefs come from? Now ask yourself how many of those beliefs have you changed in the past few years?
Unless you’ve made a determined effort to do things differently I’d hazard a guess and say none of your youthful beliefs have changed.
Yes you may have stopped believing in Santa but your religious, economic, political and humanitarian beliefs are probably still oriented around the ideas you grew up around.
Unless you went to university or travelled extensively. Leaving home, often for the first time, can change your world view.
You come into contact with new people with a wide range of different backgrounds and beliefs. For some it can be overwhelming. Too many seemly contradictory ideas, beliefs and opinions.
Bear this in mind when you find yourself suffering with a fear or phobia. Perhaps you’re trying to give something up but can’t.
You more than likely weren’t born with this thing, therefore it must be possible to become the person you want to be?
I know this because hundred’s of my clients have let go of limiting beliefs that were holding them back.
What do you think?